Fearless
My daughter, Jess Callaghan died on January 22, 2015. She was twenty years old. I have spent over two decades […]
Letters
These letters are written for people who find themselves responsible for helping others through loss. They address the cultural, ethical, and human questions that arise at the end of life and its aftermath. Although many of these letters were originally composed with the context of funeral service in mind, they are shared publicly because the questions they explore belong to all of us, and because how we speak with each other about loss shapes not only individual families, but the culture we live inside.
The Second Phone Call
My mother spent her final week at home, surrounded by family. I was there for most of it. Then I
They told me to call back when she died
A friend of mine recently told me about the calls he made when his aunt entered hospice. He knew the
The final season used to be normal
In 1970, my grandfather was dying. In the months leading up to his death, his bed was moved to the
Between pre-need planning and at-need emergency care, there’s a third season
Most people understand that death involves planning. Some plan far in advance. Others make arrangements after a loved one has
Families have already decided
Most people facing the death of someone they love arrive at the funeral home having already decided: funeral or direct
The lie that ordinary lives do not require acknowledgment
There is a belief woven quietly into modern culture that almost no one says out loud. Only extraordinary lives require
Why the Final Season Was Reduced to a Single Day
For most of history, people understood that dying unfolded over time. Death was not experienced as a single event, but
The Cultural Mistake Influencing Every Farewell
Families are not the problem.The funeral professionals who serve families are not the problem.The problem is the culture we all